I’m so sorry for not updating for quite some time.  I’m not so much apologizing to you, the reader – but I’m telling myself that it’s okay to be human.

I’ve basically gained 1 lb since New Years.  I’ve been quasi on program, but not fully dedicated.  That’s changed this weekend.

I’m eating clean, not eating crap.  I’m no longer drinking pop of any kind, especially not Coke.  I’m downing as much water as I can take.  It’s giving the system a good flush.

I’ll take the dog for a good long walk today, and go back to the gym tomorrow.

So basically there you have it.  I’m not restarting – just picking up where I left off.  I can’t wait to get this 150 lbs off me for good!

It’s been a rough week or so.  I’ve been down at the family farm babysitting the farm (owners are away at a conference). I’m alone here, and mega depressed.  As most of you know, depression and anxiety are not new to me.

But I just read an update from a good friend of mine on Facebook. Michelle has lost 7.6lbs since the holidays.  To me, that’s inspiration. She’s got a busy household with kids, runs a small business, has had other significant health issues – but still she gets to the gym, uses a trainer, and is getting healthier day-by-day.

It’s the little things like reading Michelle’s update that gives me a kick in the ass, just when I needed it.  While I’ve been at the farm, I’ve been eating lots of fruits and veggies – but also a couple major stops at Wendys.  Mmmm, the Baconator!

So with Michelle’s inspirational hard work, I’m right back at it.  I’m fighting the depression as best I can, and I’ll be still eating as best as I can until my brother-in-law and family get back from their conference.

Thanks Michelle.  And thanks to a long list of friends who are fighting along with me in the Facebook group Weight Loss and Exercise Friends of Rick.  You folks are all inspirational in one way or another.

Okay, this may be tough to explain without being totally gross – but I’ll give it a try…

I’m drinking a ton of water these days.  I’m in the washroom every 20 minutes or so, I swear.  But I’ve made a game of it. As I’m standing there in front of the urinal, I imagine that my stream of pee has little globs of fat in it.  So every time I pee, I lose a little more weight.  Because I want to lose weight, I drink a lot, to make sure I pee a lot. It’s circular thinking, right?  There’s no better feeling than standing there with Mr Wiggly in hand, peeing out globs of fat, at least in my mind.

And it`s not just a bathroom exercise.  When I`m on the treadmill, and sweat is dripping off my forehead, again – in my mind – that sweat has fat in it.  Therefore, the harder I work, the more I sweat, and the more fat I lose.

Yes, I obviously know that`s not a reality of how you lose fat, but I`ve done a decent job of tricking myself so far.

Excuse me for bragging, but I completely rocked the treadmill today.

I did a 60 minute stint mid-aftern0oon and a pretty fast walk, then I went back for more punishment this evening with 30 minutes.

I’d never have believed you if you’d told me that I could walk fast for 90 minutes on a treadmill.  But as I continue to lose weight, I’m finding it easier to do.  So I won’t be giving this up anytime soon.

I aim to head in both days this weekend.  I’m needing to keep the momentum going. I’m a little sore, but nothing that can stop me.  I’ll try to catch a good night’s sleep tonight and rest up those legs.

And then I’m back at the gym tomorrow morning at 8:30am.

That’s right.  5 lbs lost since my last weigh-in, which was just before Christmas.

That means I not only did well during the holiday season, but it means I kicked ass!

I’m now at 332 – down 18 lbs from the start of 350lbs.  And it’s 18 lbs closer to my goal of losing 150 lbs.  I’ve got to say, I was pretty pumped to see that number.

The only thing I’m disappointed in is the fact that I haven’t done any cardio.  Fitness is a must in this journey – and I need to get back at it ASAP.  I don’t see why I can’t go tomorrow morning.  That treadmill will be my biotch!

So I’m hitting the sack tonight feeling pretty good about things.  Pretty good indeed!

I’ve dropped soda, especially Diet Cokes, and am now drinking water only. It’s actually been several days now.

It was a hot and heavy discussion on my Facebook Page a few days ago.  And it sunk in – water is likely as easy as anything to switch to.  So far the lack of caffeine products hasn’t affected me.  I’ll still drink plain green tea and the odd chocolate milk.  Getting away from the artificial sweeteners has many advantages, as well.

The other thing I’ve dropped is the nasty habit of McDonalds.  I’d seriously eat twice there a day, on average, plus eat regular meals at home. Nobody really realized just how often I ate fast food. Egg McMuffins, Quarter Cheese, milkshakes… I loved it all. But no longer…

So overall, I’m pretty happy that I’ve completely busted the fast food habit and that water is now my drink of choice.  I just need to get more active.

Everytime I hear this song, I turn up the volume and listen closely to the lyrics.  This song could have been written about me, or you.

The song is Superman (It’s Not Easy) By Five For Fighting

My beautiful wife and I headed out to the movies tonight.  Date night.  We don’t do that enough.  And I paid the price.

That price being POPCORN.  A huge tub of it, with extra butter.  Mmmm!  All that butter and salt. At least I washed it down with a bottle of water.  I really love my popcorn addiction – I need to work on that if we’re going to do more date nights

And speaking of water… This afternoon I asked my friends on Facebook about drinking Diet Coke, regular Coke, and water.  The message came back crystal clear that I need to end the Diet Coke addiction right now – the sweetener is that bad for you.  Water it will be from now on.  And green tea.  I do like green tea. But I’ll drink tons of water.

So tomorrow the gym is open and I’ve got the time, so I’ll hit the treadmill for cardio.  I’ll give a report later tomorrow on how I make out.  I’m hoping for 45 minutes of swift walking to start out.

Over and out…

I’d like to share my warmest wishes for each of you to have a safe, and healthy, 2012.

I keep getting asked if I will set a NY Resolution. After much thought – I resolve to not die in 2012. I came close to taking my own life several times in 2011. I want and need to get control of my depression and anxiety, and obviously the suicidal thoughts I keep getting.

 

And then there is my physical health issues… Diabetes, high blood pressure, gout, sleep apnea – the list goes on! 

 

So yes, I want to make it through the year alive, and continue my goal of losing 150lbs, no matter how long that takes. 

 

Happy New Year!

 

Hey folks, I just wanted to give a shout to all my friends and followers wishing you a Merry Christmas!

I spent my Christmas Eve at a chinese restaurant for an awesome, calorie-laden meal with my wife, kids, and 2 very good friends.  It’s a tradition we’ve been a part of for about 12 years.  I wouldn’t trade it in for anything.  I’ll just have to live with the calorie load!

Christmas Day was wonderful with Sherry and the kids.  We did the presents and a big breakfast.  I then headed down to the farm to help out with chores.  I’ll do chores early tomorrow morning as well.

Overall, I’ve been very wary of my food intake, with the exception of Christmas Eve’s meal.  I’ve not got any activity in yet – and that’s kinda bothering me.  I have to take the time to get back to cardio.

So again, from my family to yours – MERRY CHRISTMAS!